stoopbeck

Jack likes anything with a hole. Breathing isn't an issue. Hmmm, does that mean he'll shag Owen. He did say, "skinny guy in tight jeans runs into the water, I'm taking pictures." Of course I'm still stuck on that crack!fic idea that Jack is Owen's dad so there's an ew factor.

Wait, how young is your brother. Shouldn't he have known why the girl was sticking her hand down his pants? I'm just glad Mom didn't make mention of it. I am always worried that she'll say something. She wasn't too pleased that there is canon gay on the show.

Jack can be really friendly toward me all he wants, as long as he's packing a super strength condom. Cause he's been around the block eleventy billion times.

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I heard somewhere that RTD sees Jack as Owen's "father-figure," and thus there would be no Owen/Jack. Says RTD. But, you know, Jack's Jack. He totally would, given the opportunity. Maybe.

He's 13. He understood why she stuck her hand in his pants (I think), just not why the whole Owen-not-having-blood thing would cramp Owen's dating style. And I had to explain it. Awk-ward. He should totally know that stuff by now! He's in public school!

Seriously. It'd be like getting really friendly with Kirk. Times infinity.

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RTD is on the not awesome crack. If he would just step back from both shows they'd be much better. Jack will do anyone. In the 51st century I bet there isn't even a taboo on kissing cousins and stuff. I don't want to see it though, because I like Owen and I like Ianto and I don't want Jack screwing with either of them. Except I totally approve of him screwing Ianto as long as he's loyal. Otherwise, no go.

OMG, I would not have wanted to have that conversation. Well, I never understood why Mom didn't get why Angel shouldn't be able to have sex with Buffy but I was a naive child. Well I still am. I'm somehow still shocked when I find out people I know are having sex. I mean, why should that shock me, I'm 22. But whatever, back to your brother and his woefully inadequate public school education. I know the boys in my grade eight class were very horny and some of them were having sex, which, ew. 13 is way too young to have sex. I think you should wait until you're at least out of high school. But I don't know how this turned into this conversation. I'm sorry. Tell your brother that he'll understand it when he's older. Oh and that babies come from storks.

It's also like getting friendly with James Bond.

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You know, even with everything they've said about how the 51st century is so OMG different, I was a little surprised that Jack had a typical nuclear family. I mean, from what little we saw of them. And apparently he was blond. And Luke Skywalker.

My brother didn't get the Angel-Buffy-no-sex thing either. I don't want him to be out having sex or whatever, but he's going to the same school I went to, and when I was there we at least talked about sex all the time. Plus, I read constantly when I was his age, and got exposed to a lot of stuff. I don't know.

Oh, god, just being in the same room as Bond would be dangerous. Except now I want to lock Kirk, Bond, and Jack in a room and see what happens.

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That is because even though the 51st century is OMG so different it is being written about by people from the OMG not different 21st century. He's sort of Luke Skywalker, sort of.

I was not in the group of people that talked about sex all the time. I could listen in on their conversations when they didn't think I was but other than that, nada. I did go see There's Something About Mary when it came out, talk about traumatic. But that was only because I was with my Dad and he didn't know that it was rated R and I didn't tell him because I was all woo R rated movie and looking back now I would have just told him because OMG he was embarrassed that I was laughing and I was trying not to laugh and it was just all around a bad experience. I was always older for my age, if not gullible and rather naive. But I graduated to adult books in like the 5th or 6th grade. I remember reading John Grisham with M in the 6th grade and the stupid girl in our class was all why are you reading The Client that's an adult book? And M and I were all, um, cause it's awesome and we're smart and shit.

So Jack, Jim, and James (OMG they all start with J!) wake up to find themselves in a room with no way out. Jim wants to know if the Kingons are up to something, James thinks SPECTRE has something to do with it, and Jack thinks that he needs an arch nemesis to accuse when he finds himself in situations like this. A nondescript voice comes over the intercom and says that they will be returned unharmed in a week's time. Jim and James don't trust the voice. They still think their respective enemies are behind it. Jack is trying to think if he's pissed off anyone in bed recently. Day one comes and goes with futile attempts to escape. Day two starts the stories. By day three they've moved on from boring tales to their sexual exploits. Jack is intrigued he thinks that both James and Jim are lookers. Jim wants to know where all the women are. James thinks that given the right circumstances he'd be willing to do either one of them, or both. He's open minded, after all anything for Queen and country.
By day four Jack has been flirting non-stop with both for 3 days. He keeps trying to get them in bed and James is willing but Jim is still holding onto the foolish declaration that he's straight. (Poor guy) By day five it's practically an orgy. Non of them are using protection because they've obviously "too cool" for that. Day six and day seven continue with lots and lots of sex in creative positions and Jack even invents a few new ones, and makes a mental note to try them out with the doctor next time he's in Cardiff.
On day 8 Jack wakes up in the Hub, Jim wakes up in his quarters on the Enterprise, and James wakes up in his penthouse suite. None of the three ever figure out why they were taken for that week.
Within a year's time between the two of them Jack and James have spread a new super STD all over the planet. Only the virgins are safe. It only takes 6 months for Jim to spread it throughout the galaxy.
The Toclafane are laughing now!
The moral of this story kiddies, no glove no love!

I'm very, very sorry for that.

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Oh, man, I forgot about that movie. I watched it with my mom, which is not as awkward as watching it with a dad, but still awkward.

I love you.

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It came out when we were 12 and a half. Think about that one.

Really, I don't have to hide from your pitchfork? Awesome.

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I was 13! Which was like the height of awkward for me.

Not at all! Except, you know, Kirk's gay for Spock. And possibly Bones. I don't think it would take that long for him to capitulate to the Jack wiles.

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White tapered jeans. It doesn't get more awkward than that.

Yay! Well yes, but you see he's still trying to hide from it. He doesn't want the world to know he swings both ways. He's still putting up the I only like women front. But Jack knows better.

You know I kind of want to clean that up and give it an actual ending and plot and stuff and post it. But not really, I fear rejection.

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True. Ouch.

See, I can totally get behind that. Especially since my TOS ship is Spock/Bones, and they're only together because they can't be with Jim because he's got his image, and he's in love with his stupid spaceship, and I'm blathering because it's 1:30.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO THAT. PRETTY PLEASE?!!

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But I wore them for spring picture day. I have 8x10s of it. *hangs head*

I don't really have a TOS ship. I find that if I got into shows before I got into 'ships that I'm basically incapable of going there. That means that MASH and TOS are off limits to shipping for me. If Jim is with the Enterprise then Scotty's gonna be mad.

I WILL TRY. BUT IT NEEDS A PLOT OR BAD GUYS OR RESOLUTION OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

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Darn those picture day pictures, documenting all my childhood fashion don'ts...

I watched TOS somewhat religiously, and then found a book of TOS short stories with a bit by Shatner in the beginning which basically boiled down to "OMG YOU GUYS KIRK IS NOT GAY FOR SPOCK" and I was all... bzuh? And I had to go back and watch episodes. And it was so true. It's all Shatner's fault.

You don't remember that episode where Kirk was crying in the hallway because he couldn't ever love a person as much as he loved his ship? And then went on to describe her beauty and stuff and make the audience feel awkward?

YAYY!! I AM ALWAYS AVAILABLE FOR WORKING OUT PLOT THINGS, YOU KNOW. I AM DETERMINED THAT THIS FIC WILL GET WRITTEN.

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It's horrible! Not picture day but I have this picture of me and my Mom looking horrible on my 16th birthday that just sits on the refrigerator in the kitchen mocking me. One of these days I will burn it.

OMG YOU GUYS KIRK IS TOTALLY GAY FOR SPOCK! I just choose not to see it. I mean I know it's there but like I don't want to know it's there.

OMG I do not. Clearly my Trek watching has lapsed.

WE SHOULD DO THIS WHEN IT IS NOT 0200 IN THE MORNING. OR PERHAPS THAT IS THE ONLY TIME THAT FIC LIKE THIS WILL GET WRITTEN. BETWEEN THE TWO OF US IT WILL HAPPEN, EVENTUALLY. IF YOU WANT IT TO.

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I know, I know, butting into comments is a huge no, no, but I just have to say...

...You two are made of so much win that James, Jim, and Jack's new super STD can be wiped out by a drop of your win.

I <3 you guys...(even if I don't know who scifigirl is ^^)

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Well, in my world butting in is never a bad thing, esp when talking about cracked out fandomy things.

Clearly, awesome pwns all.

I believe the question you're looking for is, "Who the eff is

scifigirl?" *really hopes

hokkaidomary13 watches B2.0*

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Oh well in that case...lol

It is the sole reason bad guys go after the good guys, the envy the great awesomenss.

Sure! :D...*SHOULD BE FLOGGED FOR FORGETTING!*

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Butt in anytime!

We <3 you too!

scifigirl is a symbol of freedom, creativity, prosperity, and individual rights.

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Score.

Ah, teh lurve, I has it. <3^^<3

*sniffles of pride, waves tiny flag of

scifigirl*

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There's a picture of me that Mom insists on keeping on the fridge, and it's the WORST HAIRCUT I'VE EVER HAD, like, random people on the street gave me grief about it, and someday I'm going to do something terribly final to it.

YES WE SHOULD.

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Well you see I used to really, really want short hair. So one day I finally got Kelly to cut it short, like right at my ears short. If I had staight hair this would have been fine. I have curly wavy hair that gets puffier the shorter it goes. (As I believe you know.) So I never went back to her again. Now when I get my hair cut short Donny puts long layers in in. That decreases puff levels significantly. Although having just realized that puff levels were high in the picture that must not be named I realize that John and Hank make everything better.

WE WILL!

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ALSO, I REALLY REALLY WANT THIS FIC TO HAPPEN. YES YES YES. ALTHOUGH INSPIRATION ALWAYS SEEMS TO STRIKE AT 0200.

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WE WILL MAKE IT HAPPEN. IT'S ENTIRELY POSSIBLE THAT WE WILL ONLY BE CRACKED OUT ENOUGH TO WRITE IT IN THE POST MIDNIGHT HOURS. WE WILL MAKE IT WORK. IT JUST NEEDS A PLOT AND BETTER ALIENS.

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WOOHOO! I WILL GET RIGHT ON THAT.

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DO THAT!

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dyoselin.livejournal.com

Ha ha ha!!!
I think I'll enjoy watching any show with your brother.

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I still can't get over the fact that my brother didn't realize Alan Rickman was British. He thought that Alan was just deep-voiced.

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dyoselin.livejournal.com

Bwahahahaha! That made me laugh real hard. Good thing coffee break is over or I'd be spilling it all over.

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You know what this means? Danny's going to have to be slowly (and I do mean slowly) introduced to Doctor Who, Torchwood, Star Trek, etc fandoms. Just don't tell him about the mass orgies until he's around 20, 21?.

And lol about having to talk about Jack liking "boys and girls and squids and whatnot." Jack is just the universe's ho, plain and simple as that. Which we all know he has no problems with.

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Oh, man. It would have to be incredibly slow. He's still in shock that Jack has a canon boyfriend. :P

Jack's happy to be the universe's ho.

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