stoopbeck

Get sunstroke and bleed copiously!

I got to work in the formal garden, cutting down the daylilies with a nifty handheld saw thingy. It's beastly hot in there. And muggy. And after about two hours of routine sawing through stems in the blazing sun, my attention started wandering. And I sawed through not just daylily stems, but a bit of my pinky.

I was already a bit sunstruck, so I sat for a moment, bemusedly watching the blood stream down my finger. Wow, that's really red, was my intelligent thought at the time.

At first I thought I could just go on sawing, but then came to the conclusion that maybe that was a bad thing.

The next thought that came into my sun-addled mind was Maybe I'd better stop the bleeding. My finger had other ideas.

After about five minutes, I decided I should go to Mom's office and ask if she had any first aid stuff. When I walked in, she was checking her email.

"Mom, do you have a first aid kit?"

"Um, I think I have one in here somewhere... what do you need a magnifying glass for?"

"No, no, a first aid kit."

"What? Why? What happened?"

I mutely held up my bloodstained hands, showing her the pinky that was still bleeding in a ridiculous manner.

We found some bandaids. I went back out in the sun some more. Then I nearly fell out and we got to go home.

Don't you wish you had my job?