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stoopbeckGah.
Mom and Dad woke me up at 6 in the morning. 6. In the morning.
They wanted me to let the cats out of the dog kennel. They get put there at night for several reasons [the outdoor cat hates dad, who gladly reciprocates, and my cat keeps me up all night]. I apparently have to let them out every morning. If I don't, the dogs "get sad because they want to be in their kennel." Yeah. I don't know why it's up to me. Anyway.
I stagger out of my room, open the kennel, put the outside cat outside, and move the cat bed and the litter box back to my room [the litter box's presence in my room is a rant unto itself] and am about to crawl back under my warm comforter when I hear my cat jump up onto the counter. She knows better than that. I stagger back into the kitchen and put her on the ground. Figuring she was looking for water, I put her in front of the dog water bowl. She drinks. I walk back to my room. As soon as my back is turned, she jumps up on the counter again. I put her down. Again. I walk back to my room... and she's on the counter. I sling her down and say some rather cross words to her. I get back to my room and crawl under my comforter.
I'm almost asleep when something hits me on the chest. It's my cat. She has jumped up onto the bed and is standing on me. I blink up at her. She glares down at me and pees. On me. I scream incoherently and throw her off the bed, moving quickly to bundle up my blanket before anything soaks through. I turn around, and she's standing on my pillow, leg at the ready, a dangerous look on her face.
I pick her up, put her down in the kitchen, take my blanket to the laundry room, and then realize maybe she's hungry. I fill up the dog water dish because she's standing imperiously in front of it and get a can of cat food out. While she's drinking, I put half a can of cat food in her dish in my room. She's too busy drinking water to notice the tell-tale noises of canned cat food being dished up, so I leave my room to go get her. As I walk towards the cat, my brother's dog pushes past me to my room. I tell her to stop. She continues walking. I yell. She goes in. I run after her, and pull her away from the cat food dish. She's eaten all. ALL. of the cat food. I think I went a little crazy for a minute or two, but when things went back to normal I had dragged her to her kennel.
"Get in there! I cleaned it out for you! I don't want to see you ever again! RAAAAAA!" was something like what I shouted.
She immediately left it. She didn't want the kennel. She apparently wanted the couch more.
I put the other half a can of cat food into the dish, stuck my cat in front of it, got a replacement blanket, and tried to go to sleep. By this point I was so angry I couldn't breathe, and unfortunately Dad had borrowed my inhaler and had also forgotten to bring it back.
So I'm lying in bed, wheezing fit to die, hating all animals in the house and Danny comes in to say goodbye and give me a kiss. Except... he decides to rub his nose on my face. And laugh evilly. Whatever. So now I'm hating all people in the house as well. Mom comes in. She listens to my tirade about animals and people making me mad and how angry I am, etceterah, and she smiles kindly.
"Mom," I wheeze, "don't be surprised if you come home and all the animals are chopped up. With KNIVES."
She patted my shoulder. "It'll be okay, don't worry. Oh, and by the way, I think your cat peed behind the fridge. You're going to need to clean that up." Exit Mom stage right to work.
Rage. RAGE. Is it time for school to start yet?
Mom and Dad woke me up at 6 in the morning. 6. In the morning.
They wanted me to let the cats out of the dog kennel. They get put there at night for several reasons [the outdoor cat hates dad, who gladly reciprocates, and my cat keeps me up all night]. I apparently have to let them out every morning. If I don't, the dogs "get sad because they want to be in their kennel." Yeah. I don't know why it's up to me. Anyway.
I stagger out of my room, open the kennel, put the outside cat outside, and move the cat bed and the litter box back to my room [the litter box's presence in my room is a rant unto itself] and am about to crawl back under my warm comforter when I hear my cat jump up onto the counter. She knows better than that. I stagger back into the kitchen and put her on the ground. Figuring she was looking for water, I put her in front of the dog water bowl. She drinks. I walk back to my room. As soon as my back is turned, she jumps up on the counter again. I put her down. Again. I walk back to my room... and she's on the counter. I sling her down and say some rather cross words to her. I get back to my room and crawl under my comforter.
I'm almost asleep when something hits me on the chest. It's my cat. She has jumped up onto the bed and is standing on me. I blink up at her. She glares down at me and pees. On me. I scream incoherently and throw her off the bed, moving quickly to bundle up my blanket before anything soaks through. I turn around, and she's standing on my pillow, leg at the ready, a dangerous look on her face.
I pick her up, put her down in the kitchen, take my blanket to the laundry room, and then realize maybe she's hungry. I fill up the dog water dish because she's standing imperiously in front of it and get a can of cat food out. While she's drinking, I put half a can of cat food in her dish in my room. She's too busy drinking water to notice the tell-tale noises of canned cat food being dished up, so I leave my room to go get her. As I walk towards the cat, my brother's dog pushes past me to my room. I tell her to stop. She continues walking. I yell. She goes in. I run after her, and pull her away from the cat food dish. She's eaten all. ALL. of the cat food. I think I went a little crazy for a minute or two, but when things went back to normal I had dragged her to her kennel.
"Get in there! I cleaned it out for you! I don't want to see you ever again! RAAAAAA!" was something like what I shouted.
She immediately left it. She didn't want the kennel. She apparently wanted the couch more.
I put the other half a can of cat food into the dish, stuck my cat in front of it, got a replacement blanket, and tried to go to sleep. By this point I was so angry I couldn't breathe, and unfortunately Dad had borrowed my inhaler and had also forgotten to bring it back.
So I'm lying in bed, wheezing fit to die, hating all animals in the house and Danny comes in to say goodbye and give me a kiss. Except... he decides to rub his nose on my face. And laugh evilly. Whatever. So now I'm hating all people in the house as well. Mom comes in. She listens to my tirade about animals and people making me mad and how angry I am, etceterah, and she smiles kindly.
"Mom," I wheeze, "don't be surprised if you come home and all the animals are chopped up. With KNIVES."
She patted my shoulder. "It'll be okay, don't worry. Oh, and by the way, I think your cat peed behind the fridge. You're going to need to clean that up." Exit Mom stage right to work.
Rage. RAGE. Is it time for school to start yet?
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no subject
Date: 2005-05-17 06:24 pm (UTC)*pats Basset Hound*
Is Danny a brother or another pet? Either way, the nose rubbing seems irritating. Good luck with that.
And good God, find the inhaler!!
no subject
Date: 2005-05-18 03:05 am (UTC)Inhaler found, but not until a later time than the post. Ah, well. :\
no subject
Date: 2005-05-18 03:06 am (UTC)Although it would be quite hilarious if he were, say, in his late 20s.
Yay for the inhaler foundness! Hope you feel better, then.
no subject
Date: 2005-05-18 03:45 am (UTC)heh
Date: 2005-05-19 03:48 am (UTC)aww...what a way to start the day. and yet, so amusing for me. :)
Re: heh
Date: 2005-05-20 01:44 am (UTC)Remind me to send you my kitty for a special good morning wakeup call...
Re: heh
Date: 2005-05-20 06:57 am (UTC)*thanks you kindly for delicious breakfast kitty*
Re: heh
Date: 2005-05-21 02:56 am (UTC)*laughs evilly at success of Patented Look O' Death*
no subject
Date: 2005-05-19 08:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-05-20 01:34 am (UTC)Awwe, now I miss my roomie...
no subject
Date: 2005-05-20 03:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-05-20 03:34 am (UTC)