That was... pretty bad.
Dec. 28th, 2004 09:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
stoopbeckSo. Here's my advice to those who haven't seen Darkness, and just to keep those who hate spoilers happy, I'll lj-cut it.
My Advice:
Don't see it. Really. If you really want to see it, wait 'till it comes out on video. It's not worth the money.
It was bad. So bad. So amazingly bad. So bad it made me laugh at times, made me want to cry at others, but mostly made me want to bang my head on the wall repeatedly and scream, "WHYYYYYY???"
And so on, and so on. Wow. It was like The Shining-meets-The Others-meets-The Ring-meets-Sixth Sense-meets-Darkness Falls, but without a plot. Hey, with all those plot points, who needs an actual plot? The audience will never notice it's gone!
Plus, you know, it didn't have an ending. And I don't mean a kind of Alfred Hitchcock-y ending, where you're all, "WTH?" and then you watch it again and everything makes sense. It was an ending like, "Hey, we don't know how to end this! Let's just fade to black and flash the credits!"
I was left with so many questions, but the most urgent one is how on EARTH did this one even make it to the theaters? Gah.
Plus, you know, questions about what the heck I just sat and watched for an hour and a half. Who were they? What were they trying to accomplish? Did that guy die? What did the pills accomplish? Why the bed? WHY? And... did I mention why?
Heh. But it had at least one freaking awesome quote: "The larvae. In the walls. They talk to me and they won't shut up." Or something along those lines.
My Advice:
Don't see it. Really. If you really want to see it, wait 'till it comes out on video. It's not worth the money.
It was bad. So bad. So amazingly bad. So bad it made me laugh at times, made me want to cry at others, but mostly made me want to bang my head on the wall repeatedly and scream, "WHYYYYYY???"
And so on, and so on. Wow. It was like The Shining-meets-The Others-meets-The Ring-meets-Sixth Sense-meets-Darkness Falls, but without a plot. Hey, with all those plot points, who needs an actual plot? The audience will never notice it's gone!
Plus, you know, it didn't have an ending. And I don't mean a kind of Alfred Hitchcock-y ending, where you're all, "WTH?" and then you watch it again and everything makes sense. It was an ending like, "Hey, we don't know how to end this! Let's just fade to black and flash the credits!"
I was left with so many questions, but the most urgent one is how on EARTH did this one even make it to the theaters? Gah.
Plus, you know, questions about what the heck I just sat and watched for an hour and a half. Who were they? What were they trying to accomplish? Did that guy die? What did the pills accomplish? Why the bed? WHY? And... did I mention why?
Heh. But it had at least one freaking awesome quote: "The larvae. In the walls. They talk to me and they won't shut up." Or something along those lines.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Word.
Date: 2004-12-29 11:54 pm (UTC)...the larvae...
Re: Word.
Date: 2004-12-30 03:07 am (UTC)I tried to tell people how bad it was and they didn't believe me. Especially about the bed part. I'd tell them that, and they'd say, "But what did a pencil-eating bed have to do with anything?" "Exactly," I'd reply.
From now on, when people say, "Alex, we have to talk about [blah]," I'm going to respond, "No, that's not what's going on. It's the larvae. In the walls."