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stoopbeckI don't know. I'm tired of arguing with people.... I'm tired of people not getting my jokes... I'm tired of being able to taste my eyedrops down the back of my throat... mmm, tangy! I'm tired of sitting in class hearing people who should know better mangle some of the best poems I've ever read. Heh. Although hearing an English professor tell a class that it was Fortinbras who comes in at the end of Macbeth was worth it just a bit... Now every time I read or watch Hamlet, I’ll picture Fortinbras coming in: “Ach, what’s all this then? Where’s Hamlet?” And Horatio’s all, “Fortinbras is SCOTTISH? Wha…?”
I need a daily supplement of scathing non-PC black humor, I suppose. So here’s my humor dose for the day. It’s not exactly scathing, it’s not exactly non-PC or black, but… it still makes me laugh. And that’s the important thing… really it is.
--The tomato thing… In the DH, check out the salad bar. There’s this sign bemoaning the fact that, due to catastrophic something or other, there is a severe shortage of tomatoes. There are no tomatoes to be had, not even for ready money. It says that there will be tomatoes again someday, don’t lose hope, etc etc etc. Almost directly under the sign? A huge thing of… drum roll please… tomatoes. Yeah.
--The strange coincidence thing. Last night, Sarah and I had a massive gnat problem, finally culminating in our trying to figure out how to put a gnat head on a pike to ward off other gnats. Today? Robyn got a pitcher plant. Perfect for instant gnat death. But do we have any gnats now? Nope, not a single one. I can’t help but laugh.
--Some stupid people thought that this guy and I were going out last year because… we had matching sweatshirts. Which is kind of funny in and of itself. But what makes it even better? They’re school sweatshirts. Everyone our freshmen year bought one. *snerk* Uh, yeah, we.. uh.. special ordered them. So we’d look just alike. Heh.
--This comment by Sam, one of the craziest guys I know, on how his attempt to make a gasoline/chlorine molotov cocktail in his backyard... "Aparently you have to light it on fire and I'm not stupid enough to light a tin can with gas and chlorine on fire from a foot away and there is nowhere to throw a molotov coctail around heer." God, I love Sam. He's just so crazy!
*sigh* Now I feel better. So that will be my cure from now on. Thinking of crazy stupid stuff.
I need a daily supplement of scathing non-PC black humor, I suppose. So here’s my humor dose for the day. It’s not exactly scathing, it’s not exactly non-PC or black, but… it still makes me laugh. And that’s the important thing… really it is.
--The tomato thing… In the DH, check out the salad bar. There’s this sign bemoaning the fact that, due to catastrophic something or other, there is a severe shortage of tomatoes. There are no tomatoes to be had, not even for ready money. It says that there will be tomatoes again someday, don’t lose hope, etc etc etc. Almost directly under the sign? A huge thing of… drum roll please… tomatoes. Yeah.
--The strange coincidence thing. Last night, Sarah and I had a massive gnat problem, finally culminating in our trying to figure out how to put a gnat head on a pike to ward off other gnats. Today? Robyn got a pitcher plant. Perfect for instant gnat death. But do we have any gnats now? Nope, not a single one. I can’t help but laugh.
--Some stupid people thought that this guy and I were going out last year because… we had matching sweatshirts. Which is kind of funny in and of itself. But what makes it even better? They’re school sweatshirts. Everyone our freshmen year bought one. *snerk* Uh, yeah, we.. uh.. special ordered them. So we’d look just alike. Heh.
--This comment by Sam, one of the craziest guys I know, on how his attempt to make a gasoline/chlorine molotov cocktail in his backyard... "Aparently you have to light it on fire and I'm not stupid enough to light a tin can with gas and chlorine on fire from a foot away and there is nowhere to throw a molotov coctail around heer." God, I love Sam. He's just so crazy!
*sigh* Now I feel better. So that will be my cure from now on. Thinking of crazy stupid stuff.
